Dear Japan...

I was updating some addresses today from postal returns -- you know, the school sends an alum something to an outdated address, it comes back with an label sticker saying "not at this address", or sometimes with the forwarding address. We get a lot of international ones too, and the way different countries handle them shows some interesting variety. France just scribbles something in French, or draws a curly line through the address. England puts a label sticker saying "Gone Away", often counter-productively over the name of the person who went (The USPS does this too, but their stickers peel up to reveal the name.) Japan uses lots and lots of stamps, the ink kind, and sometimes tapes little cardboard tags to the envelope -- usually with a French translation of the Japanese.

My favorites are the Australians, because they are always handwritten, and it's clear they're not worried about using a consistent way to say the addressee could not be found. Today I got one that had "Not in Australia or Tasmania. Try overseas." written on it. They searched the whole continent? Wow, I'm impressed. Well, okay, do I just mail it out addressed "Mr. X, somewhere in oh I don't know the Indian subcontinent"? Because I think that might come back too.